Life & Love & Lessons Learned

Marie Kondo – I just can’t…

So I’ve been hearing a lot, and I mean…a LOT, about this woman, Marie Kondo lately. My customers have talked about her, I see posts referring to her, on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter, and I have to admit, I have zero idea what anyone is talking about. Well, not zero, I do have an idea…something about decluttering, new ways of folding laundry and thanking your clothes before sending them off for donation.

I haven’t given it much thought, until I saw a video post from a friend of mine. I decided to watch it. It was Marie Kondo, who by the way, is as cute as a button, and a “basic folding method” instructional. Oh…my…God…this is what everyone is talking about? Loving on your clothes as you gently fold them…standing them up, stacking and thanking them?

I immediately thought, “She can’t have kids!” you know…to make myself feel better, but she does have kids. She actually has two of them. Now, I’m not saying that this is unrealistic, but hello? Who has time to lay a shirt flat, fold it over, fold in half, and again, stack it, and thank it? What the absolute f*#@!

I’m thinking about the 4 loads of laundry that I left on my bed right now. Piled high. And when I get home, you can bet your ass I won’t be thanking any of it! I’ll be folding my fitted sheets in a ball. I’ll be pulling as many matching socks as I can and holding them together by the opening, so there’s absolutely NO chance of them getting separated. I don’t care if it stretches one sock quicker than another. I don’t wear socks. And I don’t think my kids or husband care – because (1) they aren’t folding the laundry and (b) if they did have the nerve to complain, that would be the last time I fold their socks.

Tanks and camisoles? Those don’t even get folded. I toss those in my top drawer, along with my unfolded bras, miscellaneous ripped-off tags from old purchases, empty jewelry boxes and lingerie that I have no business wearing ever again, but keep, because you know…I used to be hot.

I have mad respect for Marie Kondo, don’t get me wrong. And for those of you who follow her, read her books and live a peaceful and uncluttered life – God bless you!

I don’t have time to thank my clothes – I’m too busy being mad at it for shrinking in the wash. Yah, in the wash.


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